30/30 Night Twenty Nine Recap | THE FINAL COUNTDOWN

Published On May 27, 2011 | By Kymbo Slice | 30 Days/30 Nights

Pardon the fuzziness, but I’ve been too busy SAXING it up. We had an ambush bar crawl last night in the South Side, hitting up all the hot spots and saxifying them with Sergio Flores‘ dashing rendition of George Michael’s “Careless Whisper”. I couldn’t sleep all night because the song was stuck in my head. If I never hear that song again, I will die a happy broad. There is only one word to describe the Sexy Sax Man – DIVA. Dude takes DIVA to the next level. Next level diva shiz, and dude’s not even that famous yet!

The night began at a slow pace as we catered to the Sax Man’s every whim. He was hard to pin down, and I don’t think he realized what he signed up for. We were crawling in conjunction with Iron City.  Thangs picked up by the end of the night and by the time we reached our final destination, Jeckyl & Hyde’s, everyone was socially lubed and ready to saxify the hell out of that place. The night was executed with a few bumps, though, which is to be expected. Our crawl schedule got jacked up, partly thanks to the lovely South Side establishment Finn McCool’s, which I can say without a doubt doesn’t know anything about being an entertaining bar. Apparently Sax Man showed up there earlier in the day without a shirt on. I’m assuming he had his signature vest on, and well – they just didn’t get the joke. They took that whole “No shoes, no shirt, no service” thang entirely too seriously and kicked his ass straight to the curb. We didn’t learn of this happening until we reached that spot during our crawl and he was quickly escorted out yet again. Ok, so you don’t want 30 people and a hilarious guy with a saxophone who will keep people in your bar and potentially entice others to come in – cool. We even scheduled time to be there and had an Iron City drink special set up and everythang – way to blow it, guys. What the hell kind of bar kicks the sexy sax man out? Clearly one that doesn’t know how to have a good time. What kind of bar schedules themself as a Sexy Sax Man bar crawl stop and then kicks him out for entering shirtless, aka IN CHARACTER? Oh, that would be Finn McCools. Shit.

Sergio is also a mega pimp. He chatted up at least three biddies at every bar we went to. He was getting digits left and right, and inviting them to come to Down and Derby where he’s playing on Saturday. I bet all of those broads show up too. Groupies! All in all, he was well received except for the one random dude outside of Marios who claimed, “The sax is a lost art – I prefer electric guitar or violin.” LAME! Don’t be hatin on the Sax Man. Not a good look. You’ve gotta make friends so he’ll share one of his broads with you. That’s how you should roll around Sergio at all times. I wonder how many illegitimate love children he will have by the time his 15 minutes are up. We’ll know when broads start popping out kids who are born with mullets.

More importantly, tonight is our VERY LAST NIGHT of 30 Days and 30 Nights. It’s been swell, but I am so very pooped. I don’t even get a night off before I hop on a Megabus with 10 of my favorite partymates at 8 in the AM tomorrow to scoot over to Detroit for the most bad ass electronic music festival in the US of A – Movement. We’ll be movin’ fo sho. I’m so excited that tonight’s excursion, The Avett Brothers at Stage AE, pales in comparison. Stay tuned for footage from our bar crawl, photos of the night and a reflective piece on my 30/30 rampage. You might have to wait until after my vay cay, but trust – it will be worth it.

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